These pubs in Ireland act like hand jobs aren't the universal currency
we hotboxed my bathroom. with nine people and two dogs.
Because you work where i will be drunk tonight I'm asking you. Is a shirt required on Halloween?
I can't help but look at my sex life and acknowledge that this is not normal behavior.
My ninety day supply of adderal just came in the mail and I literally just dumped all 180 pills into my hands and laughed like a maniac. Shits about to get cray
Jimmy johns delivers to the bar behind work. Happy vodka day!
I'm debating a nap but also debating breaking into the liquor cabinet
I don't think I have face palmed that many times in such a short period. And I've worked tech support.
The playlist was "songs to sing in the shower". I literally got fucked to Footloose.
The box said 94% effective prevention of pregnancy if used correctly but God knows I’m not gonna use it right so let’s adjust that to like a 70%
Nxt time we drink that much, we'll have to hide the crayons. Crayola-ing a mural on the living room wall wasnt the brightest idea, but it sure is classy. Right?
What do you want. Tryin to service my husband like the good wife that I am. It is bj Tuesday
Standing naked in my kitchen making nachos. I love my youth.
I hate being the first one to text him all the time...I feel like Iook desperate to get laid when the reality is that im just really horny and he has a/c...
fell asleep while jerking off ln. woke up to my hand in my pants and my cat crawling all over me
Randomize
