When did we start counting Thursdays as weekends?
When we got our fake ids in grade 11, why?
I just feel like it's time to start counting wednesdays as well...
Like... Chilling at home with a movie, hang out? Or have sexual intercourse in the backseat if his car, hang out?
He gave me a promise ring. He promised that he will imagine me as every girl he fucks in college.
The fact that I am sitting home writing a resume while you're out inducing vomiting makes me feel like way more of an adult than I'm ready to be.
You did this to me with your delicious pizza and moonshine.
I'll forgive you once we're drunk again by noon.
I'm actually not sure I need to run today, between the crazy monkey sex and breaking into my own house.
Excuse me while I download incredibly disturbing porn until I'm more ashamed of myself than of my country.
We're Scorpios. We're like dogs rolling in whatever smells good to us.
I have more sex toys than shoes - HOW AM I SINGLE?!?!?
Saw a girl outside my apartment shotgun a bud light, then a red bull, get in her Tahoe, and drive 4 people away. Gotta love thirsty Thursday.
so let me get this straight... she's showing a cameltoe that can be seen from the space station and I'm NOT supposed to stare?
I'm never going to adult. I'm staying a child. The only thing related to adult that I want to do is you.
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
I saw the president of my women in business club at the bar last night...I was gonna thank her for teaching me the business skills to create my own fake to get in... then i decided not
I just had to ask my drug dealer to "keep it simple for me". Is this a new low?
We've done worse things
Randomize