Bad news is im a slut again. Good news is its with people ive been a slut with before.
New channing tatum movie.
I'll bring my vibrator.
I can't believe he would be such an ass
Your boobs are way too big for you to be worrying about anything.
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
Nothing like wearing your heels and smelling like henney in the afternoon
Covered in confetti and bad decisions
Well its kinda hard to gift wrap an orgasm
Dick in a box?
He showed up to a baby shower and kept telling everyone he was late because he was pregaming. And then tried honking the pregnant girls tits
It'd probably just be a lot of profanity and hyperventilation and deteriorating into tears anyways
so just a regular conversation then
5 minutes Isn't even long enough to bring me even close to an orgasm. How selfish. Think about baseball and fuck me you idiot.
As I was about to fuck him, he requested a moment of silence for Leonard Nimoy.
Fuck you. I've got onesies to keep me warm at night. And this bottle.
Let this be a lesson to you, parmesan cheese crumbles are not a good substitute for coffee creamer, no matter how high you are
At one point I believe I was despencing medical advice while wearing a sombrero and a hulk hand
Plan b and 5 hour enegery breakfast of a champion
I woke up wearing mittens dude
I woke up in my bathtub with the potted plant from downstairs.
checkmate.
Randomize
