If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
Does it really count as two different guys if they're brothers? I like to think of it as one and a half.
I hate that the only Italian aspect of me is I get red and sweaty when I drink
I think I should receive an honorary Heisman... I mean, I did sleep with two of the finalists
I just did a sobriety test in a tutu.
Its official, if she bites your dick through your jeans, ya'll go together. A lesson you shouldn't have to learn after the fact.
My parents just told me that if I stop drinking I could do something great with my life...
They obliviously haven't seen you dance on top of a pool table then
We just stood there eating chocolate chip pancakes, watching you sleep on the bathroom floor.
If he doesn't give you the same feelings you get when the pizza guy arrives, he's probably not worth it.
I think it was a low point but honestly at this point I've had so many that my life is like a valley
If I take one more surprise finger up the ass this week there will be hell to pay.
Woke up in the hospital naked with my id's taped to my chest. Also apparently puked on two guys, two girls and an escalade (at the same time). Good night.
It's not even 8pm on a Friday and I've already got a guy to tell me how big his penis is. Watched anything good on Netflix lately?
Ran into my FWB on my walk of shame and went back to her place. Even my walk of shames are awesome!!!
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