Just soaked up some whiskey with a paper towel and then squeezed it into a cup for consumption. New low.
If it makes you feel any better I'm plucking my mustahce and drinking. Alone.
i told him i was on my period. he said, and i quote "can we not just lay down some newspapers or something?"
i dont care that its taken 20 hrs to pee without hurting, BEST HATE SEX EVER.
I took the precaution of putting my macbook the one place in the dorm there is no way i can piss on it... the toilet
Def walking back to my apt with a blender, an empty vodka bottle, and a half eAtn drumstick cone.
Did the game of beer pong go wrong before or after the cops and fire department showed up?
That UFC fighter fucked me so hard I have what can only be described as a "cuntcussion"
The extent of "getting it in" was this creepy guy sticking his finger in my bellybutton
Literally just napped at strip club. Don't know how long
Thanks for putting up with my drunk friend last night. Its all fun and games till someone pukes macaroni under your fridge.
After round two, I told him he deserves an award. He bowed and did a princess wave WHILE his dick was still inside me.
So high I legit spent 20mins in the shower just holding my tits cuz they feel bigger than normal.
She wanted to get out of there before you guys woke up so she wouldn't let me find my underwear. Lol So I apologize to whoever finds that in your room.
we had to invent a new word for how drunk I was last night
Randomize
