do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
just woke up and my boobs have "fun police" written on them
There needs to be a term for a female version of a rusty trombone
I can actually hear my brain cells scream as they die when she speaks.
i just realized that fran drescher is the 90's version of a guidette.
You two kept repeating the same thing over and over. It was like looking after retarded pull-string dolls.
why oh why did i suck thise tits. nothing but trouble fuuuuuu
I feel like I owe it to them to wear pants.
If the cops knock on your door and ask if you saw anyone throw an orange out the window I was never there.
Okay now that I've been wanting to eat these hot cheetos in the bathroom, I know it's time I need to stop smoking and go to sleep.
I've got to stop being so hungover that I puke in the fine establishments of this glorious town.
he showed me his third nipple on the first date. I might have low to no standards, but my god.
My neighbors are white girl rapping to Hamilton again...
Hiding in a kitchen with no pants orange juice abs a pillow...please joun
I haye tequella
Omg. I meet up with you guys with bodily fluids on my chin ONE time and suddenly I'm a whore.
Randomize
