his penis was crooked so i rode him at an angle. he seemed used to this.
'Well you know, stuff happens' isn't really an excuse for sticking a cheeto in my ear
am i gonna have visuals on this?
you are gonna see the trees puking up fireworks and ninja pheonixes will shit rainbows and fire
Instead of a hangover my body just feels like shame
That is a hangover
I would prefer a headache
Wow it must be so difficult to be as popular as you are and smoke as much weed as you do
so "excuse the stench" wasn't the correct thing to say when your boyfriend's parents walk in on you shitting. Live and learn
Idk what the interview would be like but I imagine you in a suit and tie surveying a nervous freshman and eventually leading him into a labyrinth of debauchery and clapping him on the back, saying "welcome to the fraternity, son"
I think my body knows it's dying and is just shutting down
WINE AND FILM. TALK ABOUT AN UPGRADE FROM NETFLIX AND CHILL.
Oh shit that's not good dude. I'd head straight for Williamsport hospital the first ingredient in that shit is lithium batteries. You don't want to know what the second one is
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
how early is too early to start drinking over the gilmore girls revival
it was like reliving my childhood drunk at a bar.
I had a dream I hooked up with Post Malone. I can still smell the dream
My boyfriend's mom is the manager of Wendy's. The same one I took a pregnancy test in.
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