I need to shower the guilt off of my thighs.
i'm in hospital, i have an exam in 3 hours and the man in the cubicle next to me is doing a noisy poo. this has to get better.
I really want to sleep with her friend. I'm hoping our casual sex relationship will somehow lead to that.
I think you should know he took my pants (buttons and zippers included) and my thong off with his mouth alone. I found my husband
I'm getting very good at recycling my hook ups. So even though i'm having more sex... I'm the same amount of slutty.
Yes! I like to call that picking from the buffet!
why would she cut her hair? she needs all the distractions possible from those texas-sized gums and horse teeth.
I wish we had a justin bieber to wanna fuck when we were younger... But noooo we just had hanson
advice for life: when the cop takes your tallboy, don't ask for your coozy back
he tried to make a toast, but hit the moving ceiling fan with his beer instead
They had to restock the bar 3 times before midnight. There is a bridesmaid dress hanging in a tree outside.
If I have to masturbate more than twice a week you fail as a fuck buddy. Just so you know...................you failed
It was his birthday this weekend. I had to carry him 6 blocks, in 3 inch heels. The entire time he was trying to molest me, eat my face, and try to stop every two feet to tie his shoe. He would light a cigarette, forget about it, almost burn everyone, throw it out, then decide he wanted to smoke. He kept repeating that he trusts me with his life.
...Wow...
I could be a kindergarten teacher
Dammit now I'm pissed. Its like I am torn between two worlds. A world of girls, and a world of people punching other people in the head. Both are just so beautiful.
You left something at the house but since I'm back home now so I can just mail it over. Address?
I didn't realize you could put dignity in a box these days.
Tequila Tuesdays need to not carry on throughout the week. Having a sad Saturday
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