Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
just went onto Yahoo and the featured article had a picture of one of the Jonas brothers. last two times the featured article was a celebrity's face the headline was "Michael Jackson is Dead" and "Pitchman Billy Mays is Dead" so naturally I got a little excited. Turns out he's just engaged. Who gives a fuck.
What do you want me to say to her? "Oh hey, I need to borrow your soon to be husband to make a porn, cool?"
a girl just walked by me crying on the phone saying, "all I ever do is menstruate"
Medically YOU CAN'T BE AN ALCOHOLIC TILL 25!!!!! WE GET 3 BONUS YEARS!!!!
If you can count on one hand the number of times you have actually, truly nearly died this month, then you are not really living yet.
this probably sounds so sketchy, but hes going to jail in a month so he needs a place to crash for now. Hes sick though, and hes paying half our rent
Nothing says happy gameday like waking up in only an ACC Championship shirt in the qb's bed with a different football player
Also, yes, I look pretty rough. But my ovaries fought back this morning so getting dressed decently was not a priority.
In two unrelated events today I have had frostbite on my toe and cum up my nose. Who says life stops when you get married?
Never have i felt more judged than when i was throwing up in front of a hello kitty shower curtain at 5 in the morn
The ONLY place I sext is in my anatomy class. It's an amped up level of playing doctor.
For a second I thought that you were becoming a decent person again. I am glad I was wrong.
Jesus when did you leave my house? I found 2 bottles of wine, vodka, and a book with blow all over it wondering if I was read bedtime stories
the only fun thing to do here is drink beer and make mistakes. i feel like im in college again
Randomize
