just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
Everything about him screamed your future.
Hopefully. Play it cool. Bust out a few jokes. Chew with your mouth closed and show your boobs.
The bathroom is trashed. Someone took down all the rings of the shower curtain and Scott threw up on the curtain liner. All the soap and shampoo is in the guest bedroom and the lightbulbs are in a drawer. And there are vom footprints.
Apparently blazed enough to think that the sizzling meatballs in the pan were calling your name...Ssssteeeeeve
He skyped me to learn how to roll a joint and for us to masturbate together. And you said a long distance relationship wouldn't work.
had to go back to that apartment this morning to get my other boot. it was tacked to the wall
Dude. Zebras have bad attitudes.
There's a time and a place for everything. Except for getting wasted at a work event, puking in the parking lot, and sleeping in your car overnight.
I got punched in the face by a Cowboy last night. Then he bought me a beer cause o convinced security not to kick him out the bar. Start of a fairytale love story? I think so.
I think the worst part about being a real adult is 1)having a high stress job that makes me want to get stoned 2)paying for reefer using my own money 3)realizing my boyfriends children probably have more weed connections than I do anymore
I woke up this morning with 3 phone numbers, a red Chinese New Year envelope with cash in it, and a winning scratcher all stuffed in my bra. I'd say it was a pretty successful Thursday night.
You kept trying to make cocktails with my protein powder last night...
He's ready to settle down, whereas I'm like "More shots please"
The best part about theater chicks is nothing is too cliche or out of line. I just fucked her Braveheart style in my entry way while saying goodbye.
Randomize
