4:25 am: I want you here. Ugh.
I'm twenty-five. I'm too old to be watching my friend throw up in Chipolte Parking lot.
I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
this kid just offered me adderall in exchange for my meal points. college at its finest
Watching Fresh Prince at 9am with a beer in hand and he just said to Uncle Phil "Sometimes I worry that I'll never get my life together." I feel like that was a sign from above or something
"lets watch the sunrise" turned into "lets have sex on the roof at six thirty in the morning"
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
The Angel on my shoulder is now resorting to merely reminding me that, "You will regret this later." I'm not sure if he's learning how I think or just giving up. Either way, should make life a bit more interesting.
Well my dad thinks I wake up at 3 or 4 am every day. Really it is just all the booty calls, but I'm glad he thinks I am so motivated
Ive fucked up. im like a feral dog rabidly chasing an infrequent dream amidst a cataclysm of disaster
L'Shannah Tovah!
Whats that? My new stripper name?
She just got on the scale. frowned, got off and took off her pants and then got back on
She may be more beautiful than I am, but I bet she hasnt pissed in as many public places as me...
I just heard your voicemail. Glad you like my dick and think I'm cool
You should of known that i was high if i refer to myself as melting into anything
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