I was totally willing to let her keep giving me blowjobs as long as she didn't think we were in a relationship.
I'm at the point in my career when i know a sites a trap and isn't real porn
college drinking is stealing all my money, thank god planned parenthood is somewhat free
It's official. I'm a squirter. Wasn't a one time thing.
Did you know you could bring s cooler of beer to the nail salon?
Can you come get Dustin he's putting taco bell fire sauce on cigarettes trying to light them again.
Well tech shes born nov 12, but since her head was out on the 11th, she claims both days as her birthday
Currently playing beer pong versus the girl i lost my virginity to.....and her mom
I'm so high. Midnight pancake breakfast in bed
Interesting occurrence: the application I use to keep track of my periods and sexual encounters just notified me it had been over 4 months since you were logged as an active partner and ask if I'd like to remove you from my options. Wow, kmsl.
sweet sixteen by hillary duff just came on and i feel like i let lizzie mcguire down for being such a stoner
it was cool until he whispered 'sounds like you need a good dicking' with a completely serious face and i just lost it
I'll call you on my way home
Oh my god I'm going to die between now and then... can you at least tell me if y'all hooked up???
I have 2 phone numbers written on my vagina. I told you I shouldnt be left to my own devices after tequila shots.
Taking a shot every time the Russian in COD says vodka... BEST drinking game ever.
Randomize
