That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
I wanna be on tlc
Impossible. You are neither fat, fertile or fashionless.
I found those 18 whoppers we bought.
Nothing says "I forgive you for puking on me during sex" like a Facebook add the next morning...
Well, I'm getting my ex-boyfriend to get me a z pack to cure the chlamydia I got from my married fuck buddy so that I can fuck one of my students.
My cab driver just suggested I brush my teeth because he can smell "the party" on me.
I also love beards. The playoffs are like christmas for my vagina.
I'm pretty sure at any given moment you could wring out my liver and get a couple of shots of jäger.
That number that I thought was that dude's number...was actually my district manager's number. Fuckkkk.
No she probably looked into my aura and saw that my penis would ruin her.
Can I get that on a shirt
You spent like 10 minutes trying to hit a golf ball that was actually a cigarette butt. And then fell over.
How the hell could he be confused. He had a naked girl running to him. I feel like he would enjoy that.
How do I convince my friend not to get tattoo tributes to her cats?
WHO DOES THAT
I told her it'd send up tons of red flags and she responded by telling me they're her babies. And she's sober.
What is the acceptable way to offer a trade of sex for a few hours of body heat?
Fuck man, I am really high rn and all I've eaten is different forms of pie
Randomize
