Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
Just saw a guy from Kansas and a guy from Nebraska arguing over who had less of an accent. God Bless the Midwest.
This guy just came in and told me how he bought a clock for his cat so his cat can know when he's coming home...
He's doing the single life. He recently finished like a 3 year relationship. You can't date him.
But I don't want to date him. I just want to look at him. Naked. And in my bed.
I wonder what acid is like for a blind person... Can we find this out?
When your boyfriends ex-girlfriend texts you to see what you're wearing to his sister's wedding that you were not invited to, nor knew about. I think it's time to call it quits.
I almost itched my nose with the lit end of a cigarette. Help.
New drink: empty coke can vodka water maple syrup. Get on my level
this place is dumb. no one understands my Sunday morning alcoholism here.
I don't know what you're doing this morning, but obtaining Plan B is my number-one priority.
I don't WANT a sex disease! Especially one assigned to me by my supervisor..
Nah I think he's a bit weirded out I worked out where he lives from a Facebook photo
Don't tell me you're on acid again
The tequila monkeys have a drum solo in my skull right now. I can't imagine Emily feels better.
How much weed can I reasonably smoke now if I have to leave for work in a bit over an hour
Randomize
