New drinking game watching teenage mutant ninja turtles movie and drinking every time raphael says damn, someone says april or ms oneil, and shredder appears And every time we see a mustache
Maybe you should have studied instead of worrying about who is going to have sex with you
i think there mostly mad about the fact it was 6 pm not the fact i blew a .255
We've already decided our costumes for next Halloween. She's going as Cookie Monster and I'm going as Elmo. She's just going to ask for Oatmeal Cookie shots, and I'm asking for Red-Headed Slut shots.
Dude, its January.
We're going to do the voices too.
He talked me into making a sex video, no worries though, I was wearing sunglasses.
It's raining. Will need ride home and blow job.
Whoevers house this is has only beer and cream cheese in the fridge. Thats the diet im gonna go on
Water skiing blazed is the most scary thing I've ever done.
hey the jello shots wont freeze
How much Everclear did you put in them?
uhhh all of it
Yoga may not b such a good idea for me today. My liver is obviously in cahoots with my colon to pay me back for the past 24 days of misuse . Downward dog could have catastrophic consequences.
That was a very uncomfortable conversation to have without pants on. But his mom was pretty cool about it.
I actually had to apologize for "being too aggressive about harry potter"
We fired a shoe out of a medieval cannon. I know not where we got either one.
I guess I'm an especially affectionate person under the influence of tequila.
It’s 830 am and the amount of Valentine’s Day snaps I’ve already seen makes me either want to vom, drink a bottle of wine, or buy chocolate
1000% No lie I was just looking on insta and was thinking about taking a bottle of wine to the face..
Randomize
