no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
a man that wears gold spandex underwear and party boys other people is a man after my own heart.
think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
When you're on the hood of a car, 10 mph feels pretty fucking fast.
The look I see on guys faces when they realize my nipples are pierced remind me of when my mom used to come home from the grocery store and surprise me with poptarts.
Did you leave a blizzard on my porch last night? Or was that someone else giving out a metaphorical threat to me?
I know how to say Yes, No, and Your Mother's Vagina. So almost fluent.
pretty sure the dicks i sucked were punishment enough
Last thing I ever expected to say, "Get your finger out of my ear or I will stop sucking your dick."
We are both federal employees and Obama gave us a four-day weekend to lie in bed. Do you know how many orgasms that will be? I knew there was a reason I voted for this guy.
He was pretty bad, I wanted pizza the whole time.
You're always so late and I'm always so drunk.
He's perfect in every other way. Is buying him a cockring too forward or just honest?
you woke me up at 1am last night high on cough syrup to tell me jay z was an idiot for cheating on beyonce
One of the guys just came in and goes "i walked all the way home with a pumpkin". Night just got better.
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