dude just tell them you don't wear clothes. they'll understand
Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
Best idea ever: Giving hobos a beer and having a chugging contest to win another beer. Most fun I have had downtown in a while.
the trail of clothing leading from the bed to the door was in the exact order i needed to put them on. underwear near the bed shoes by the door.
Thanks to this cookie, I have now eaten something other than skittles today.
no you're not allowed back
come on. everbeers was a great idea. you fucks had a great night
The stoned girl at the dining hall just handed me a single chicken wing and insisted that she's "unable to procure more rations"
Every pair of shorts I try on makes me look like some kind of powerful lesbian wizard.
That is like, the point of shorts
I have a rage boner right now. An actual erection brought on by the amount of sheer hatred I have towards nationwide.
I'm so hungover that I just wrote up my will because I'm afraid I'm gonna die. I'm leaving you my bong.
The Wolf of Wall Street “I ain’t fuckin’ leaving!” speech when the cops broke up your party though...
You threw up a gallon of vomit. I really have never seen anything like it in my decade of partying.
OMFG I JUST SEARCHED DILDO ON THE WORK SHARED AMAZON ACCOUNT!!!!!
I currently hiding in an upside down garbage can please come find me
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