I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
He said he's was gunna give me some pain meds. I'm not sure what they are but I just gave him a thumbs up
Your therapist is not going to think that you using your vagina as revenge is okay
He leaned in to kiss me and I dodged him but i fell on the floor. I guess I never got up cuz I woke up on the floor and he was in his bed
Like I couldn't describe it to you but if they did a lineup of penises i'd be able to pick it out.
I made my own utility belt like Batman. It has a cup holder for my beer, cell phone holder, a little pocket for condoms, and a sewing kit just in case.
I'm getting turned down for sex. Apparently my "sexual appetite" cannot be satiated even by a man who's such a deviant he went to prison for jerking off in his car.
And we're now at 8 people from the office coming to my desk to ask me "do you feel better?".
I gave the bathroom attendant $5 last night for turning the sink on for me. What. The. Fuck.
everything in the house taste like gin even the water, friday nite was a success
he just exposed your dildo usage to the table.
I found Erin. She's getting a back massage from the coat check boy and drinking all his whiskey.
Thanks for making me a drunk burrito last night and cutting it into bite size pieces, I always knew you were a keeper.
I had to ask my mom to look for my kegle ball...
He just kept going down on me. And he was all like, do you mind? No motha fucka, who would? All of his ex's, apparently. Whatever, he's a gem and I'm keeping him.
Randomize
