I'm afraid we're only dating because we're too lazy to look for anyone else.
do u usually make out with people before telling them your name???
Being a girl sucks.
Being a boyfriend sucks for about a week, too
i am high, trapped with a bunch of skaters and asians watching a cat on lsd on youtube, the girl on the couch next to me is getting fingered, and there is lady gaga playing. god has forgetten about me
i just entered cocaine into my calorie counter.
i could totally date him if i was just drunk the whole relationship
I should take him calling me "a freak of nature" after sex as a compliment, right??
Also, I don't remember opening my gifts from my family. It was cool when I woke up with a new ihome.
For future reference "I'm too drunk to come today" is an acceptable line to get out of work. I love my job
Don't even start with me. You know damn well if you walked into a bathroom with two girls naked in the shower you would stay too. Regardless how drunk I was or whether or not you were my ride.
i think i just asked a donut if it was ok
Just gave candy to a strange child. Not my best move.
You're the reason why I want to be a better drunk
Now we're discussing the sex we had and the later lack thereof. It's like marriage counseling via snapchat.
Pretty good. Thinking about getting day drunk and filling out job applications so I don't hate myself as much
Randomize
