does the new i-phone have a pregnancy test app?
No better way to find a friend than to offer cyber sex and see what happens
he pointed at my clit and asked with a confused face, 'whats this thingy??"
There really should be an "avoid ghetto" option on my GPS.
Just saw a man in a wheel chair using his feet to push himself backwards through a crosswalk... good morning Atlanta
we were naked in his bed and he told me all about what a "baller" alexander the great was.
Following a car with a GPS. We don't know where he's going, but he probably has a better idea of where we're going than we do. Also, very high.
dude what did you give her she's eating her pocket lint
Her stepmother interrupted our sex to tell her it was midnight and she wanted to do a sympathy shot for her 50th.
Don't break up.
We built a fire and had sex in the kiddie pool. Then he washed my hair
Strong work
Every bar we ever go to has a woman there who hates him. Getting so much vagina has never seemed so not glorious
If I hid at school to avoid the cops, is it fleeing and evading or just being a good student?
I have just been informed that my company has ray guns. I WORK FOR ACTUAL BOND VILLAINS. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
Haha I had a heart to heart with a stripper so I would say it was a success?
i need to get drunk because i'm an angry sober
Randomize
