Asian chick on skype stripping for me. Hold on give few min
there's no way I could forget finding someone else's hand in my pants
Get here, there are important joints to be smoked and pies to be eaten
Since you're going to wake up and see one bajillion missed calls from me, I just want you to know that's a perfectly reasonable number. Now come downystairs.
On the plus side, I know I'm allergic to latex now. Like really fucking allergic
So the dog chewed my vibrator last night. It added a nice new texture actually.
you must be at least a level 5 friend to unlock my sexual orientation
Just convinced a housekeeper at work to set up her 401k. Gotta start hittin the gb every morning before work. Happy 420
I will buy you batman underwear babe. I'll make sure you wear them every time we have to adult.
My cat is watching me play with my new vibrator
He put a doughnut around his dick and I ate it. What can I say. It was a good fucking night.
i had to call the bar to ask if they found my bowling ball. That good of a night
it's like my eyeball is being humped by my eyelid
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
It goes to show, Sane person, daddy doms, little girls, all of us may seem different but deep inside we all grow wisdom teeth
Randomize
