it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
Blackberries need to come with a feature that disables texting to certain numbers after 2am based on content. liek disabling texting to 'dad' containng the words 'lets try to find more blow.'
My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
In hindsight maybe we should have moved his homework instead of playing quarters on top of it.
just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
when you get a chance can you look up 'free abortion clinic' for me? cuz i dont think i'll be lucky enough for a second miscarriage.
I just got asked if I have a rule for sleeping with people. Like they have to buy me dinner first etc...
On that note, do I have a rule?
he thinks im joking when i say don't visit. i mean it's summer...he was the college fuck and now it's time for the summer fuck
you handled that situation with as much grace as someone puking involuntarily could
He posted a picture of my bra on facebook with the caption "I don't know who I hooked up with last night but if this is yours please come pick it up".
He chucked my pickle at the bouncer. Fucker, I wanted that.
I've watched enough of my roommate's imported Japanese satellite to know when the exchange students are calling me a whore.
We were drunk having sex and I knocked over her bedside table/fish bowl and she jumped off to check if her fish was still alive but she made me pasta so it's cool
I let my daughters ex boyfriend take me home from the bar. Hey, at least he's old enough to drink
But on the bright side the arresting officer was just as hot as I remember and I took a pretty okay mugshot.
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