I just jerked it to the same porn two nights in a row... and she says I have problems with commitment...
I got a Cease & Desist email from NBC for downloading Bruno. I am not going down for gay porn.
I thought I hit my peak drinking in college. Just finished first day on Wall Street. College was nothing.
Oh my god, I hid a wine bottle in my boot.
My therapist is concerned about your alcoholism.
You were so excited to be getting 4 tickets to the Whale Rodeo.... That high
I'm not a horrible person, I just see what everyone chooses to politely ignore.. And occasionally say it aloud whilst deeply intoxicated.
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
You're the reason I lose Never Have I Ever
Yup he definitely fell asleep. I'm trying to bone an old man
Would it be playing god to put spaghetti on my pizza?
I hope dressing like a sexy, but very grown up and intelligent, secretary while out shopping helps disguise how high I am right now.
you know your booty call is really trying when he offers to pay the toll for the bridge you have to cross to get to his house
false alarm, still single
I told him he had to put his dick inside of me at approx 1159 to ensure it was birthday sex. i was 19 when he entered me.. came out 20. winning.
Randomize
