If I sit on the seam of my jeans just the right way when the bass hits, this might be my new favorite band.
he asked if he could put his cape on while he was still inside me.
the arrest was probably divine intervention, cause i think we were heading to an ill-advised threesome.
This better be legit desert and not your penis alamode
we got cut off at 8 am. He spilled his drink three times on the plane. this should be one hell of a vegas trip
I don't believe u have enough text space to describe the dimensions of his penis.
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
Ran into my neighbor that's always crying. I wonder if she's like; "I ran into my neighbor who's always playing with her vibrator?"
If we laid all the dicks that's have been inside of us end to end it would be as tall as 4 story building. 40 feet of dicks.
I told him if he wanted to lose weight he had to learn self control. Less than ten minutes after that I ate a cookie off the floor...
i just thought a plastic bag was my cat. i just pet a plastic bag. that high.
I'm sorry I peed on myself in front of your boy toy. You should tell him I'm usually not that trashy. It was nice meeting him tho..
Good news y'all just straight up snorted 2 adderall and I'm not a real being on this plane of existence anymore and I'm ready for finals
Just found $31 in my desk drawer. In $1's. WTF happened last night?!
So is he the one who got away?
They all got away. I’m a catch and release kind of girl.
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