Whats the glycemic index on semen?
I feel uncomfortable when she gargles my jizz.
If your 8 lb baby was ham it would serve 6-8 people
And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
I can't wait until weight watchers comes out with a beer
i jus dunped the rest of my drink down the sink and tool my bra off. pretty sure this is the best decision for everybody.
I have to think about this realistically and not with my vagina.
have the fact that the early bird is danced upon by the prettiest strippers be your motivation
She's going to get preggers, drop out of school, and end up working at mcdonalds. Great for our mcdoubles habit but bad for her future.
The front camera on the 5S is SO much better. This is great development for my international sexting.
there's cocaine on the ipad again........... was your sister here last night?
I just woke up ass naked on top of all my sheets, with no blinds in my room because i used them as togas, my back is killing me, im covered in sharpie, i have no memory of last night, and im pretty sure im still drunk. I consider the night a success
I feel like I missed the land of milk and honey and instead wound up in the land of beer and pizza. And yet, I think I'm happier here.
I'm trying to find a fanny pack so I can bring pizza on my run
This couple is walking their pig around campus
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