Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
Don't put random dicks in your mouth or any other crevice for that matter... and i'm home in 30 seconds
Wish I got that text last night instead of this morning.
i should not be allowed to orgasm that much in one day.
Hey, I didn't ask that stripper to put her unds in my mouth, it was just covered by the plus package fee I ordered.
I have a test in the morning in sign language about signs for drugs and alcohol use. Im drunk and rolling a blunt. I've never felt so confident about a grade in my life.
I woke up with a black eye, bruised knuckles, wearing women's clothing, in a house I did not recognize, next to a solid 9. Thank you for making 21 special.
I guess I've just seen a lot of penises since then
Apparently being drunk on a southwest flight and yelling "TURNUP" during take off is looked down upon in this state.
An hour is enough time for me to get drunk and win a dry hump marathon so I hope you have somewhat similar or better goals
For our 1st date, he tried to schedule a rock climbing. I suggested, "how about we meet at my place and you can scale Mt. Vagina?"
Who'd have thought a guy with a lisp would be so good with his tongue?
I've found my soulmate with the cardboard Dos Equis man.
How many times is too many times to use the word 'fuck' in my thesis?
got some info she was last seen with some guy wearing goggles
Slept in and having coffee. No sounds of whipping and no veiny dildos next to me. This is good. How's your mornin?
Randomize
