problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
I haven't gotten laid in forever. I'm obsessed. I imagine I this is how Ethopians feel about food.
She knew it was going down when I had her search for "condoms" in my iPhone Maps.
just turned my empty handle of passion fruit smirnoff into a fish bowl. I love college.
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
I smoked a bowl while he ate me out, you need to change your major to match making asap. You are a guru of love.
Using that mug my little cousin painted for me as an ashtray for my weed...at least next time he asks me if I'm using it I can say yes
I'm hoping that banging a 24 year old 3 times cancels out banging that freshman on Wednesday
I am currently exfoliating my skin with the toilet. We've never been so close.
I know how to say Yes, No, and Your Mother's Vagina. So almost fluent.
As if right now I am a humanitarian. Full story to come in the morning. It involves sex.
Lets get coked out and steal a parrot this summer
The only times girls talk to me at clubs is when they're asking if I'm okay when I'm puking outside. Or if it's a tranny
It's gotten to the point where waking up in my own apartment is a surprise
I mean we don't talk anymore but I still see him around wearing that sweater he stole from me after we had sex
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