i just google searched 'can you pop your ovary'
...you put a chicken patty in my toaster last night..
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
dude i need to stop getting high. i cant afford to eat like this...
Just stole a pregnancy test from Wegmans because I didn't want to pay 13 dollars to find out my life is over.
we found him in the shower with a bottle of jose saying "this is Mexico's fault"
Tell me why I keep soberly hesitating to go pee in fear of breaking the seal. Thank you college.
the arrest was probably divine intervention, cause i think we were heading to an ill-advised threesome.
I woke up locked in the bar...this has redefined partying.
I'm surprised they let us keep partying at that hotel bar, that's like the 3rd time I've had to try blocking the view of him peeing off the balcony. I earn my free drinks.
If I get back to the house before you, I'm setting up the swing. If you get there before me, it's chains and cuffs.
This is the difference between me and him; he buys you flowers, I buy you a dildo
right after that u started calling me g-force and started trying to bellyslide down his drive way
I'm at the drive thru window, five minutes out. If the bathtub is empty or you're dressed when I arrive I'm not sharing.
she referred to her cum as “pussy butter” so needless to say we had a good night
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