So let me get this straight. You would sleep with an uncircumcised guy whose name you didn't know, but you won't try the new shrimp taco from taco bell?
Watching intervention at a bar. Who let this happen??
apparently he's bringing me two things i like. he said one was him and i'm assuming the other one is his penis
How long is a courtesy make out supposed to last??
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
I just want a pillowcase full of fast food so I can eat and sleep this hangover away
You were so drunk last night you thought you force pushed the automatic door open.
I also turned off the Anchorman DVD start menu before cause I didn't want Will Ferrel watching me lose my virginity.
after he went down on me he said he wanted an air freshener for his car scented like my vag. i cant even.
I asked her how many times she came and she said "Oh god I can't count that high, Rutgers doesn't teach us that."
I'm drunk filing my taxes in a bar on a Monday afternoon in a Regular Show onesie. I think I'm starting to get the hang of this whole adult thing.
I need my daily rules like rule one don't put your dick in the vacuum cleaner
I'm gonna fight the coyote
Just bought plan b at 8am. Then the cashier asked if I wanted to donate to the children's miracle network. Fml
How was it?
Incredible. Everyone in the world should be having the kind of sex I've been having.
He should write a pamphlet or something...
Randomize
