if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
the sex wasnt even worth changing my sheets
She touched you, you're now contaminated for 48 hours. Please watch out for rashes, hives and STDs as she's known to have all three.
So I cleaned the toilet last night at 2 am and woke up with pink eye. Never doing that again.
Going to bed. I have to wake up early and teach small children. And then have affairs with their fathers. I'm going to get deported.
If im still in the bathroom puking when the sirens go off please distract the cops.
It's like my ice maker knows when I wanna get drunk
I hope your perfect outfit is a slutty power rangers outfit. That's been my dream wedding since I was a kid.
At what point would you like us to save you from yourself?
Right, well, that begs the question of where did you get the whip, why are you using it, and why don't you carry one around more often?
Sooo the theme of my 21st is rapidly becoming Gay Mexico
I just sent a snapchat of my boobs for Adderall. It's finals season.
You have cats and a ten year IUD. Embrace it.
I'd have to have a ring. Like I don't want to be called "the ex girlfriend that shit on me"
it's like the easy bake oven version of plastic surgery
Randomize
