Did you go home with that guy without me?
Sorry boo - it's pouring and I found a boy with a car
ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
I need to stop sleeping with republicans and cowboys fans.
I JUST SHOOK HIS GRANDMOTHER'S HAND. WITH COCK HANDS. THIS IS NOT FUNNY.
When I start puking tomorrow, just let me be. it'll start around 8:35. just let me heave. i love this part of my morning.
there's sperm and chicken noodle soup everywhere
I'm gonna do some tripping... In the direction of balls
My birthday is in 11 days. Going ham. Consciousness will not be an option
when I went into his room, he was sleeping on his stomach, almost as if to silently say, "you're not touching my dick tonight".
I blacked out at work again... Except this time my boss watched me throw up by the bus stop and some woman let me sleep on her shoulder for an hour. Why does this keep happening?
My ex's new gf is pregnant and he is sterile, so 2016 is starting off well.
This drink tastes like mosquito repellent.
Of course his mom thinks you're nice, she doesn't know you have sex for cheeseburgers
One time!! I like sex and food....
I should not have moved in with him. He's got porn stashed everywhere like a homosexual squirrel.
You love porn!
Not in the sugar bowl when I'm making my Mom coffee I don't.
Randomize
