yeah I know. she is a stupid fat trailer trash bitchwhore and I hate her
but when she came up to me in the bar I had to be all like "OMG HEYYY how are you, I haven't seen you in foreverrrrr!!"
but for the record, yeah, I hope she gets mauled by a bear and dies
I told him I had my daily dose of vitamin c so i wouldn't blow him
God. I'm so broke I don't even have a dollar to snort my adderall through.
Watching intervention at a bar. Who let this happen??
Can we end it on a good note at least? Can we fuck and then never talk again?
When I realised he had a girlfriend I just started telling them about my ex and how I write poetry about him. Which I then read to them. They just gave me pity looks and left me to finish my spliff alone.
The cop asked you after the breathalyzer what you think you blew and you very discreetly shouted "I'm pretty sure i blew Kyle on the way here "
I was figuring I'd break up with her after work, but before Taco Tuesday
He's like a father figure to me, except we have casual drunk sex every now and then
I mayyyyy have moaned a name that wasn't his
I need a drink. No, several. I need several drinks. Drunk, I need to be drunk. Definitely need to be drunk
skyped with him for 45 min in the bath while i shaved my legs. new level in the relashionship
He shit with the door open. I think that means we are in a realtionship.
Had a moment of weakness, slept with my ex last night
So that's why our room smells like tequila and shame.
She and I had some intense sexual tension earlier when she dumped a package of apple straws all over my body.
Randomize
