Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
So did the night end well for you?
I stole a traffic cone and drunk texted my sister because i couldn't think of any other girl to text
She threw up everywhere and is crying about a fictional character who died on Grey's Anatomy
I miss your penis. And I totally say this as a friend. I just miss it because it's great. You should be very proud of it.
you kept say ridiculous things then repeating them in perfect classical latin. You are onee intelligent drunk
Um I just overheard that the new guy spent a month in jail. Obvi another great hire.
I am burnt. Have a black eye. Face dove into the grass and got pissed on. Time of my life. God Bless the USA.
We tried. It's impossible to cum while bouncing on a trampoline. It's like trying to sneeze while keeping your eyes open.
Sry I came all over your dress. Think of it as a Vegas souvenir.
I wasn't that drunk, I know my limits. When peeing became difficult I stopped taking shots.
I woke up to the sound of him repeatedly tapping out SOS in Morse Code using his hard cock.
So the guy I hooked up with during welcome week just tried to booty call me from across the lecture hall at 9am. I don't think he gets how this works...
i just woke up to her giving me a toothy BJ so I had to break into your bedroom and steal about 4 condoms. Sorry for waking you. :(
McDonald's and a car nap. I feel kinda human
I think getting right with the Lord should involve more than me and a bottle of tequila.
Randomize
