One thing i hate about playoff baseball: George Lopez
last time I sleep in the lobby. woke up to some girl asking me what floor I lived on. somebody put me, couch included, on the elevator.
just heard a glass bottle fall in lecture and my first thought was to yell party foul.....is it friday yet?
Everything is fine now . The coast guard said we just can't take the inflatable trampling out past the break way anymore
Only I can have a panic attack in the back seat of a cop car and have them move me to the front seat.
That place is a DUI and an STD waiting to happen. I think I'll pass.
Since he's sober and out of jail, he acts like we are the worst people on Earth. Fuck him, the only acceptable time in life to do coke is the early twenties. He won't take that from us.
Ran into my neighbor that's always crying. I wonder if she's like; "I ran into my neighbor who's always playing with her vibrator?"
Just woke up in his bed wearing only his shoes. I don't know how to gently say hey dude get the fuck up and take me home....regardless these are some nice shoes.
My parents got me a bottle of vodka and a puke bucket for christmas. I've already used both.
I shaved an Xmas tree into my junk.... I placed your present underneath.
As we were leaving a memorial service last night he turns to me and says, is it too soon for a post funeral blowie?
Jarrod's passed out on the chair with a cup of milk and I've been staring him down in an attempt to use telepathy to make him spill it. Attempts unsuccessful.
I know right, I would blow him just for the satisfaction he would taste like vodka
Soooo you're telling me you support us groom's men giving lap dances to willing patrons?
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