I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
it's not like i was drunk to the point of NEEDING help...i just wanted someone to offer to hold my hair or something.
We blazed in her bathtub. All 5 of us. Not easy bro
YOU COME FROM SAD WHALE FAMILY, DEEP IN OCEAN!
Dave used his AAA card to get my car towed to my house so I could get drunk. Evil genius.
If my sophomore year were to be made into a novel, it would be titled "dances with salvia"
It's a never ending cycle of men I've fucked knowing other men I've fucked. I need a new town.
An we can hold bottles of vodka in our hands singing yo ho a pirates life for me
and here comes the time of my day when I haw to convince a guy to drive my cape and my handle to my dorm.
My only positive piece of news is that my roommate is moving home for the summer, so our stress-relief sex will be much easier to get away with.
i keep seeing little orange spots im starting to freak out
you tried mixing adderall in your visine last night..
You bring me burritos. Of course I text you during sex
THERE IS A DOG IN THE CLUB. I repeat a dog in the club. I might have laid down and petted it..I have no shame.
Kyle passed out in the tub after breaking a glass and shouting, "WHAT ASSHOLE GAVE ME A GLASS?" His girlfriend gave it to him...
Last thing googled on my laptop last night was vagina chaffing. What the fuck?
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