I'm blazed at jack in the box and my order number is 420. I wish everything in the world made this much sense.
He was crying to my sister about feeling like a bad person. Then he groped my breasts.
we fucked to don't stop believing. most epic sex EVER.
my mom used to put diet coke in my bottle. i can pretty much handle anything.
she wrote "need hug!" on a sticky note, put it on her back, and passed out on his bed. they're trying to figure out how she got into his room...
i gave him a hand job with one hand and held the 40 with the other. this is like freshman year all over again.
Just got invited out of group to take shots after hearing her gay friend say "why would I give him my alcohol so you can suck his dick. It's going to be a good night
I do wanna see you. And we can just lay here and watch a movie and listen to me cry.
I still think the kiddie pool full of jello option is worth exploring. Just sayin'.
You said that when your ex gave you a blowjob her mouth was like velvet
You wanna know how bad I feel? I couldn't get out of bed to get the remote, so I just downloaded the comcast app on my phone so I could change the channels
Tequila Tuesdays need to not carry on throughout the week. Having a sad Saturday
I just wrote the Drag Queen from Saturday Night on FB and apologized for licking her. Weirdest thing I have ever typed...
Before he gave me the breathelizer, he told me to "blow like you're blowing your boyfriend". I like him. My tax dollars are well spent
Truth be told it's significantly easier to get over someone when they file a police report on you
Randomize
