she's leaving w me bro, I've been buying her mad shots. She's seen my apt. So locked down.
You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
did u really fuck my little sister???
im not saying yes or no but just know that my answer rhymes with "mess"
he's dressed up as spiderman, i don't understand why he's crying.
Cumming on a girls face is guy code for you're not wife material.
Today I learned you can't titshake with a corset on.
i just got on a party bus. i think i left my belly button at the bar.
went from writing my paper to watching obamas speech to crushing beers and singing springsteen in a crowd of 100 within 20 minutes. I love this country
I think I just used lyrics from the Sister Sister theme song to let a guy down easy...
He made me eat donuts off his dick. donuts, jen. DONUTS.
I do have a life. It just consists of making scarves and chesse straws now
And I just want to be like your tongue is not a FUCKING sword
The security deposit's gone, let's trash this motherfucker
Dude, where are you?
In back
of car
... whose car?
your were asleep with people making out on top of you. you didn't even look bothered by it.
Randomize
