Billy Mays died!
I know. And the US is beating brazil...what's wrong with the world?
I have minimal recognition and a lot of burns on my tongue and my vagina hurts.
I think he's on the stoner protein diet. I just saw him, at 3 am, spreading mayo on a slice of deli ham and sprinkling salt on top.
I fell asleep with my vibrator still in me. I am the Queen of Sad Masturbation.
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
so does the 200 for rent and 150 for utilities include the never telling my boyfriend about the guys i bring home.. or is that extra?
You force fed me chocolate chips and avocados for 3 hours and kept asking me about my trip to sweden when I was 4.
Hey.. there are 2 people i've never met before spooning in the bathtub. Please elaborate on what went down last night.
Currently siting in the living room naked, staring at one of the girls across the street in her living room naked. This is like the most intense starting contest of all time.
It's like the dark age of my sex life being stuck here
Some dude peed on tonys floor because drunkness
They offered him a bucket as he was peeing and he was like "Nah, I'm good"
Thanks for fingering me to orgasm during Wu-Tang Clan
if you were broke and planning on using koolaid as a tequila chaser which flavor would you pick?
OMG WE ARE UP TO THREE MINORS WORKING HERE. I AM NOT READY FOR THIS MID LIFE CRISIS.
The cat hopped on my bed and watched me masturbate naked with a vibrator. I've never felt more sorry in my entire life
Randomize
