I think vodka calistinics prior to and during beer olympics was a bad idea
I drank almost a whole fifth last night. Woke up with blood everywhere wearing a "stereotype this" tshirt. How fitting
Legit screaming match in this bar over the differences between cupcakes and muffins.
Can't wait to go see my drug dealers baby being born. He rolled all of the "it's a boy" cigars into blunts.
dude you guys. You can't throw up in the recycling bin. I don't think vomit is recyclable
i'm on the subway and being revisted by the ghosts of tequilas past.
this may be my drink champagne alone in a bbaby pool in the dark night
of course! give me a few hours to recover from chugging a 4loko out of a frisbee, and it will be rage time yet again
Just did a "spirit of homecoming" bump off a stranger's credit card. A stranger that dropped us off at home. Erica's bad. How do allllll of the Eastern Europeans know how to find drugs so easily?!?
I just made cupcakes.... Vodka icing. Results in the morning.
Just told my boss I wasn't coming in to work because of a serious case of blue balls. Totally made having them worth it.
One minute we were playing beer pong, and the next minute I was sprinting to my apartment with a watermelon. wtf happened in between?
He stopped in the middle of us banging in order to check in for his Southwest flight.
Remember when you brought a guy home from the bar... to our parents house.... on thanksgiving eve?
You know you started drinking too early in the day when you have a hangover at midnight
thats called having FUN
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