so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
He said we were driving the golf cart through the woods screaming 'iceroad truckers' for four hours in the dark
After she saw a msg in his phone from me that listed the reasons why I love his cock, I don't think I can deny fucking her ex.
Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to.
you didn't want to pay for the shots so you negotiated with the bartenders. Apparently 1 shot is worth 5 seconds of motor-boating you.
he can get married early and ruin his life but he sure as hell isn't ruining mine with a shitty bachelor party
I sent a picture of my balls to one of my best friends, so basically it was an average night.
I've never wanted anyone to have herpes as I much as I want him to right now.
Why was I lying under a truck last night?
"Accidentally" bump into him after class.
I'm gonna "accidentally" put his dick in my mouth.
I don't remember much, but I remember he called me the dick whisperer, so it must not have been all bad.
Who is this? I have a text from you last night telling me your name and to train hard for Tuesday, please make this make sense
He tried to eat me out...through my pants.
Hey. Did I get punched in the face last night?
Yeah. I told you I would and you didn't believe me.
Newest quarantine problem - I’ve watched all of the porn. Like everything on the the internet, all the DVDs, mags, VR, leisure suit Larry all of it and I’m still horny af
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