I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
Ah, the precious few moments between when i wake up and when i realize why i'm sleeping on a treadmill.
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
i got really high and listened to the spongebob squarepants theme song and, i swear to god, it was in german.
I developed a drinking game for WoW. Everytime I die, I take a shot.
Please get laid.
Class is significantly more awkward when you know that your teacher knows what you look like with your legs behind your head... Just saying.
I am burnt. Have a black eye. Face dove into the grass and got pissed on. Time of my life. God Bless the USA.
theres a kid in a leopard robe and sunglasses filling up a gas tank. i miss college
When I get home we should play "let's see how many Christmas movies we can watch before we start having sex."
I had to explain to the waiter that I'm not the DD because I can't drive, but as the Designated 'Make Sure No One Gets Roofied Or Hit By A Car On The Walk Home'-er, I should still get the free drinks.
Are you two whores ready for me to turn the light on so you can see what you came home with last night?
Did I run into a tree or get punched in the face?
Both.
I'M WORRY THAT MY VAGINA WILL NEVER KNOW THE TOUCH OF A MAN AND YOU ARE MAKING A MIXTAPE
Just bumped into my ex. Blowing a dude in the ladies' room at Disney World. I guess it really was her not me.
Randomize
