I'm sorry I'm just not ready to become vampire yet
I realized today that I should stop thinking so much with my vagina instead of my brain.
Please tell me this doesn't mean another "surprise road trip" where I spend all my money on gas and the SURPRISE destination is the abortion clinic.
But what if I pay for the gas?
the blizzard started in kansas. im debating driving to a bar now so i can get snowed in there for the game
Do you remember that blonde girl he brought home from the bar on Friday night? She didn't leave until Monday afternoon. We didn't even know she was still in his room...what a sketchy weekend.
you duct taped a twenty to your thigh just in case and passed out.
Nope she woke up in a hotel room alone on 55th street. A guy in a lamborgini gave her a ride this morning. She was walking barefoot home
Toilet is so comfy. Serious question/why does weed make every surface feel like bed?
You didn't even properly utilize my pigtails.
Also, the greatest of ironies: I got shampoo confiscated by security while Corey managed to get pot through. MERICA!
The guy that stalks me just looked out his window and saw me in his neighbor's hot tub. Get your shit ready the fraternity wars are starting.
I ain't lettin her quit anyway. We don't fuck enough for her to meet the housewife requirements
I'm so drunk and angry about the Michigan game the fact of my relationship being over doesn't matter
I'm on my third roll of toilet paper. Today can fuck right off.
wasn't that the evening we made out with the girls from the dental school, drank 3000 beers, almost had to beat up a guy at the strip club and James nailed some hot piece of tail and took her OSU windbreaker, which my dad went on to wear multiple times after finding it in the garage.
Yes. To all of that. Yes.
all i'm saying is don't blame me if your purses are filled with whoppers
are we talking malt balls or BK?
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