that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
I know its time to do laundry... i cant even find a dirty sock to wear because they all have jizz in them
I will never try to masturbate with americas funniest home videos playing in the background ever again
Things I love twice as much when drunk: Taco Bell. Office chairs that roll. Classes.
i didn't realize we were even dating until i ran out of weed
explain the broken jalepenos in my underwear drawer?
he's home with a concussion now...but apparently i'm still the highlight of his freshman year
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
The people at subway are so judgy when you stop to get a sandwhich on your walk of shame
Just followed a blind kid around for 20 minutes to see how awesome his guide dog was. And he was pretty fucking awesome
It was 16 hours of liver killing mistake making goodness
That's why my New Years resolution was no more blondes. They're all bad news
HOW DID I LET MYSELF GET SUCKED IN HE HAS A PENIS FOR PETE'S SAKE.
i now know why i keep getting pictures of poop. apparently someone put my number in a girls bathroom saying i am a poop lover.
you text any of them back? this is probably the most women you'll ever have texting you in your life. don't squander a good thing
So I scratched the whole boyfriend plan and got wasted. Wanna try again tomorrow?
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