the shit that comes out of a woman's mouth when she knows you can't hit her is fucking unbelieveable
Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
dude you made out with his girlfriend and stole his credit card to buy more drinks
well when you put it that way, I sound like a terrible person
The worst part of it is that he's not the first man I've fucked with 2+ chihuahua's.
One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
He stole her cigarettes and walked 15 miles just so he wouldn't have to wake up next to her. God I love being a lesbian.
does it count as a threesome if she tried to blow the dude who was passed out next to us?
Attention ladies coming to the party tonight! Tonight will be another chance to win the 5 bucks for getting my cousin hard. Bring your a-game, no one has been able to overcome the whiskey dick yet. Good luck.
Blacked out, Had to be carried out of the bar again by two large black bouncers. Asked them to be my "boo thangz" Again.
Fun fact. I am at the police dept. getting served a warrant for unpaid ordinance... and the officer was a one night stand from like 10 years ago.
Sometimes I actually rage on Tuesday, come back, and do homework drunk and pull an all nighter.
why does CNN give a flying $@*# about the royal baby so, so much?
i hope they name him Joffrey
I had to hose off vomit off my driveway at 9 am.....so hot
Why is it pressure? I want to see your cute face and possibly sit on it. You make it like its a bad thing.
Can u pick me up? Lost my keys.
Sure. FYI- you "lost" them on the roof, trying to throw them over the house.
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