playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
bailing my boss out of jail is a great way to spend memorial day
she just totaled her parents new car because there was a bee in the car. So she crashed into a light pole to kill it.
She stared for a good 10 seconds before calling my dick "awe-inspiring", and then proceded to give me blueballs. All in all the ego boost made my night break even
They kept trying to slap each other but they were poring beer onto their hands first referring to it as their baby powder
It was just a reflex. BOOM I kicked her in the face
I'm with Tony. He said he volunteers his ball sack for waxing but you will have to wait a few weeks. It is a freshly shaved sack. I guess he thought he was gonna get lucky. Wtf?
Smooth sack
You're getting spoiled, you better send me at least a side boob pic if you wanna see my dick dressed up as Davie Crockett.
she was braiding my hair and singing forever young while she vommed everywhere at the same time. Talent.
I just got stoned alone and repierced my nose. don't ever tell me I'm unaccomplished
I just got stoned by myself and am eating cookies so I'm right there with you
You gave him that scrunchie you made and called it your "sex offering".
well that's what you get for sleeping with a guy called 'the defiler'
Having weed delivered to your door is like having your own personal Santa Claus
Just by hearing the girl outside reciting the info on her fake ID, I know it's gonna be a good night
Omg there's puke under my pillow. Clearly I puked and tried to hide it. From myself. \n
Randomize
