who's fault is it that she tells me today she is only 16 because i definately met her at the bar...
just found a beer in my hamper. even my laundry is a dirty alcoholic.
You know you had good weekend wheb we you hook up with three different girls and you don't feel no pain when u pee in the morning
The state of Wisconsin is just irresponsible for letting me buy this many fireworks
No. He just yelled "youre having one more orgasm!" So he made that happen and then he rolled over and went to sleep.
I have located the smell of the stripper and narrowed it down to 3 girls in class
Fair enough. I'm gonna finish off half a bottle of Brunettes in the shower anf relive the good ol' days. We need a reunion
So after he broke the crutches and got us kicked out of McDonalds, we stole a bike and when we got back to the hotel, he jumped out the window into the bushes.
Yeah when he is drunk, he seems to think he is Captain Americas Canadian counterpart, Captain Canuck
I'm stuck in a tree and request your assistance ASAP
I forgot to lock the bathroom door. He walked in, saw me on the toliet, nodded, and walked back out.
I threw up in my brother's Easter basket
I gave her two orgasms and then we laid there and she ate jelly beans out of my belly button...that girls a keeper
I threw up in my 8 AM. Morale is low.
That was before I lit my hair on fire
We should write a country song: “Blacked Out on a Sunday”
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