Whats the glycemic index on semen?
remind me to tell you about the ham sandwich empire im building
i like him when i'm sober AND when i'm drunk.i've been searching for this my whole life
I just wanted to let you know that this afternoon I took a piss at the same toliet you drank out of on New Years Eve.
Maid of honor is brides sister and single. Likes lemondrops. You're welcome.
WHY AM I ALWAYS DEFEATED BY THE LATIN COCK?!?!
Birthday Treasure Hunt was to follow the clues. At each spot there was a stick on tattoo and a shot and at the end there was 2 cases of beer. I have 13 tattoos and don't remember turning 18.
Let's just say after this weekend I'm known as Shameous the Irish bar fighter.
When my parents ask if I met any nice guys in California, I'm going to answer, "No, but I have gone home with alot of nice girls". Too much, too soon?
He was like low grade Riff Raff, but I hit it. Twice. His grill popped out the second time.
DO YOU REALIZE HOW AWESOME MY GRANDMA WOULD BE IF SHE GOT HIGH
She swallowed the key to the cuffs, I've been having to explain the pink fuzz all morning.
i think i just lost a toe
Well, I can't remember Thursday and my left ass cheek hurts like hell, I'm guessing Mike's bachelor party was a success.
it’s my vagina i can do what i want to
Randomize
