Facials are how you say "I love you" in porn star.
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
just read twilight to her over the phone, while in the bathtub, candlelight...i'd love to say no homo but that was so gay.
So am i just your go-to 'i found a tick on my penis' number?
he has been on a 2 week bender, has been homeless for a week and a half, and leaves for madagascar in 2 days. Do we worry or is that normal?
They were going around the house breaking things and screaming "Not my house!"
plus shes a stripper, ive been with strippers, if you fuck this up your penis will never forgive you
Found a dirty envelope on my seat w ur name and $122.50 written on the front. Nothing inside but what looks like dirty pine needles
In the memo line of the check she wrote sexual healing.
I vaguely remember telling a bum she was worth more than this
When someone comes out of your vagina and stomps on your dreams, you'll understand.
I just made the pizza guy say helicopter six times in order to get his money. Even he knows how stoned we are.
no joke- she just sprinkled parmesan cheese into her champagne and slurred "I just need a little snack"
I was going to text you that earlier, but I felt like before 10 was probably to early to bring up boners
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
Randomize