Omg I def was not. I wasn't that drunk. I showed that I stuff my bra but I didn't whip my tit out.
I couldn't tell if he was hitting on me or if he was just mentally challenged.
Your brother just informed me that half a mouthful is a unit of measurement. I love talking to members of your family.
im sitting in a tub with a sombrero on.. im just kind of confused.
I feel like after that many guys, all of the water in your body is just replaced with pure jizz, honestly.
I haven't found him passed out in the living room covered in noodles for a while now so I guess he's getting better with the drinking.
We are going to need a water proof camera with a flash....exit routes....lots of booze.....and a tutu for good measure
High water is the most godliest tasting water in the world.
BECKY! ITS ANDY FROM LAST NIGHT WITH THE PILL
Andy, Sorry you have the wrong number. But good luck with Becky!
I think that thing where I have 2 boyfriends is happening again
he thought it would be funny to put his dick inside a beer bottle and wear it around. until we all realized how small his dick would have to be to fit in a beer bottle
Like when I see him I look straight through his appearance and just envision a big walking penis.
Yeah I would come and meet you but there's 3 polish girls yelling at a drunk polish guy in the carpark outside. They just dumped a whole pizza over his head and I want to see where this ends...
Googled 'how drunk am I' and it was NOT helpful
Turns out I made out with a woman dressed as a unicorn here 10 years ago
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