I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
My brain is officially off for summer until late august. If that guy wants to fuck me, he better do it soon.
ENDLESS SCROLLING ON TUMBLR WAS MADE FOR HIGH PEOPLE!
What has two arms, one testicle and no credit card debt? This guy.
hungover waitressing a bar association event. im being judged by actual judges.
I can't tell if I'm hungover or if my cat just knocked the lamp on my face
You shouted "FUCK SHANIA TWAIN" and then downed an Aquafina bottle of white wine none of us knew how to react
Why did the fire extinguisher taste lemony?
Day drinking is so dangerous way too many construction workers out there to flirt with
Wake up we need to beat the walk of shame rush hour
Qdoba locked their bathrooms last night.. I suppose so people didn't pee all over them? I considered it counter productive considering I just peed on the outside of their building then. I had to pee
He wants me to tell you "my boner misses you"
I saw a spider on my bed and my first reaction was to throw my weed bag to safety
Uh oh. Put down the vodka cancel the clowns and get rid of the donkey
Hammered...8am...why is there chickens in the living room?
Randomize
