He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
And no, shaving doesn't make it look bigger, either
brass monkey on radio. cant stop dancing.
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
she danced around my room naked waving around the gold trojan magnum condoms singing "i have the golden ticket."
little did she know i was taping her the whole time.
Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
Well he's in a two year college so technically hes a senior. At least can we just pretend I'm not robbing the cradle.
Haha its ok. When we got back you sat in the car and attempted to tell me in sign language you were blacked out lol
i just remember sitting on this bed, naked, STILL WITH A CONDOM ON, and suddenly these random girls were in the room shouting at me
My mom just saw the bruise on my chest from the bite mark he left. Played it off that I hit myself w a box of beauty products. She believed me. God I love working retail sometimes.
Yeah we invited her back for chicken nugget sandwiches
im drinking out of a pineapple, so yea.
I may have just masturbated while on hold with the IRS. don't judge me
I honestly don't understand how your night went from singing a touching rendition of Africa to an angry political rant to low key trying to find a frat boy to bang to doing dishes to yoga
He listens to me complain and in return I send him naked pictures. It's a win win situation
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